I'm not a hero. There are heroes, and those who worship their heroes. I am not a hero. And I will not worship.
Why do I have to be ignored all the time? What makes me so uninteresting and my brothers so very very interesting. Everybody knows them. Everybody pays attention to them. If one of them were to walk into the arena, the jellicles would notice. Yes, they are heroes.
Not me. I am the youngest brother, and coincidently the least blessed. But I am still my brothers' brother aren't I? Aren't I a tom? Don't I have personality, character, history, stories to tell, triumphs, failures, hardships, easy victories, good days, bad days, happiness, sadness, anger, love, hate, grudges, desires, secrets, talents, flaws, paws, claws, legs, a body, a head, and a tail? I am a tom! I am a Jellicle! Look at me! I'm there, in the shadows. Look at me! You'll find me behind one of my brothers. Look at me! There I am, dancing in the back. LOOK AT ME!!!
No, they will not look at me. I'm just some added security, one more set of eyes, one more set of claws. Just one more dancer dancing in the back. One more singer singing along with everyone else. No one desires me. No one cares to look into my eyes long enough to see the loneliness there. They don't even know me.
Look at me. Everyone in my family is a hero. Don't I have some of Deuteronomy's wisdom? Don't I have some of Munkustrap's leadership? Don't I have some of Alonzo's bravery? Don't I have some of Rum Tum Tugger's charm? Don't I have some of Macavity's intelligence? They are heroes, why not me?
Of course, my family also shares a curse. Hasn't father outlived every one of his mates? Isn't Munkustrap crushed under the burden of responsibility? And Alonzo, always in his brother's shadow, always Munku's right hand tom, never more. Rum Tum Tugger, who can never settle down. Macavity...
And me, buried in loneliness. If I could just have one elder's approving nod. One kitten's squeal of delight when they see me. One tom's respect. One Queens loving smile... One specific queen. That calico, that sweet, beautiful calico...
I did have a chance once to be with a queen. That last ball. As a joke probably, I was selected to do the symbolic mating dance with Victoria. I admit, I was excited. Victoria is just so graceful, so elegant. I knew her well of course. Well, not well as in intimate, but well in the fact that I knew much about her. As I do everyone. Unfortunately for yours truly, it wasn't a mutual thing. When told of the choice, she replied, "What? Who?" I was pointed out. I offered an awkward smile, and she returned it. "Oh, Tugger's little brother. So his name's..." The mating dance went well, and after the ball she promptly forgot my name. Oh well. Such is my life.
I do not hold it against her, much. Everyone's like that, except for maybe Munku, and... Munku. I wouldn't mind so much, if it weren't for a secret obsession that erodes me from within. My already achy heart cannot take much more of my one idol worship. I know, I said I would not worship. But this is different. She is not a hero. She is just a playful young queen, who occasionally gets into some mischief. A sweet young queen who knows nothing but happiness. And she is so beautiful...
Why do I have to be this way? Why can't I be like everyone else? Just walk on up and start a conversation. Maybe start taking walks together. Walks lead to naps, naps to hunts. Soon we are never apart, sole mates joined in perfect love. But not me. I cannot talk to them. I don't know how. I have tried, but they lose interest so quickly. I've never even gotten to the conversation.
No one knows me. I am just, "Tugger's kit brother" or "One of old D's sons" or "Munku's youngest brother." A tom among heroes. A mortal among gods. No one really knows me.
Couldn't they just remember my name? At least? At least pretend they care about my existence? Why can't they remember my name?
I AM A TOM! I AM A JELLICLE! I AM A HERO! LOOK AT ME!
Look. At. Me. MY NAME IS PLATO!